


nightmares

by spinnerofyarns



Category: Silicon Valley (TV)
Genre: M/M, Nightmares, cute fluff, different ways of helping with nightmares
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-09-15
Updated: 2016-09-15
Packaged: 2018-08-15 06:04:12
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,363
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8045167
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/spinnerofyarns/pseuds/spinnerofyarns
Summary: Jared has nightmares, Richard tries a bunch of different ways to help. Cute cuddly fluff with a little bit of sadness.





	nightmares

**Author's Note:**

> Okay this is a little more painful than anything I wanted to post for Sweet Functional Husbands Week but it's cute! and Jared is going to be okay!  
> \------  
> Hey! If you're reading this and/or if you've ever enjoyed anything I've written, I hope you'll consider participating in the SV fan fundraiser for CAIR and the ACLU. You can donate anytime between now and March 15, and any little bit helps! Go here for more info: https://svagainsttyranny.tumblr.com/

            “no…please…please don’t hurt me, please don’t – AAAAAAAAAAAAAGH!” Jared jolts awake, gasping for air, and sees Richard’s concerned face hovering over him in the dark.

            “Jared, it’s okay, it’s just a bad dream,” Richard says, stretching his arm across Jared’s chest. “No one’s going to hurt you. You’re safe. It’s okay. Deep breaths.”

            Jared obediently heaves deep lungfuls of air, feeling his heart rate slow down to normal.

            “What happened?” Richard asks, his voice soft and gentle, his hand rubbing Jared’s chest in slow smooth circles.

            Jared shakes his head. “I don’t want to talk about it.” _I can’t talk about it, I’m not ready to talk about it. I’m not sure I’ll ever be ready to talk about it._

            “Okay,” Richard says, turning away for a second to get his laptop from the nightstand. “Do you want to watch cute bird videos, or baby animals?”

            “Baby animals.” Jared whispers.

            “Okay.” Richard pulls up a video of a mother otter floating in a pool with her baby, and Jared snuggles up next to him to watch.

            Richard kisses Jared on the forehead. “I love you,” he whispers. “You’re safe here, I promise.”

            Jared feels safe too, safe and warm and cozy with Richard’s arm around him, watching baby otters playing around.

\----

            Richard jerks awake in the night, and for a few seconds just stares around the room in the dark, trying to figure out what woke him. Then Jared, curled into a tight, tense ball beside him, whimpers, and Richard immediately puts two and two together.

            He reaches out and places his hand gently on Jared’s bony shoulder. “Jared,” he whispers. “Jared, wake up.”

            Nothing. He tries again a little louder. “Jared, please wake up.” Jared shudders suddenly, violently, and whimpers again but does not wake.

            Richard bites his lip, then tries again, using Jared’s birth name this time. “Donald, you’re having a bad dream. Wake up. Please wake up. It’s okay. You’re safe.” Jared stiffens, gasps, and rolls over to face Richard.

            _He looks awful_ , Richard thinks, and then feels guilty. But it’s true – the dark circles under Jared’s eyes seem to have settled permanently into his skin, and he’s so thin and pale that Richard is beginning to understand the “starved a virgin to death” comment.

            “I’m sorry,” Jared says softly. “Did I – “ He breaks off, wringing his hands apologetically.

            “It’s okay,” Richard says, reaching to grab Jared’s hands. He can’t stand to see him like this. “It’s okay. You don’t need to apologize. You’re safe.” These moments, Richard thinks, are the worst, Jared half-awake and frightened and apologetic, convinced that someone is going to hurt him. “Take a deep breath. Good. Keep breathing, there you go, that’s perfect. You’re okay. You’re safe.”

            Jared heaves deep, shuddering breaths. Richard, still holding onto his hands, rubs his thumb over Jared’s knuckles. “Good. Keep breathing like that. It’s okay. You’re okay. It was just a bad dream. You’re safe here.” Slowly, Jared’s breathing evens out and he snuggles closer to Richard.

            Richard lets go of Jared’s hand and puts an arm around his waist, pulling him even closer. “Is it getting bad again?” he asks softly. “You’ve had a nightmare every night this week, is something wrong?”

            “No,” Jared says, shaking his head. “I’m okay. I promise.”

            Richard looks into Jared’s startlingly blue eyes, puffy and red from crying and sleepless nights. “Jared, you promised to be honest with me. What’s going on?”

            Jared sighs. “It’s nothing. I’m okay. They’re just flashbacks.” He’s survived worse alone, he doesn’t need to bother Richard.

            Richard gently kisses Jared on the forehead. “I’m sorry,” he whispers. “Is there anything I can do?”

            Jared pulls Richard a little closer. “Just being here is enough,” he says, closing his eyes.

\----

            Richard spends most of the next day online, looking up ways to deal with or prevent nightmares. Most of the things he finds are for parents of small children and seem way too childish to help Jared, but he makes a list of some things to try, and orders an essential oil diffuser from Amazon.

            He makes dinner – well, reheats some of the soup Jared made earlier that week – as soon as they get home, and makes sure Jared actually eats it because when his sleep patterns fall apart his appetite soon follows. One they’ve both finished, Richard washes the dishes and tells Jared to pick a movie for them to watch.

            When Richard sits down next to Jared on the couch, he’s still scrolling through their Netflix queue.

            “ _The Imitation Game_ just came out on Netflix a few days ago,” Jared says. “I know you’re fond of Alan Turing…” He trails off.

            “Sure, let’s watch that,” Richard says, snuggling close to Jared and sliding an arm around his waist.

            When the movie ends, Jared is nodding off on Richard’s shoulder.

            Richard nudges him gently. “Jared,” he whispers, “Jared wake up.”

            Jared sits up, blinking and disoriented.

            “Come on,” Richard says, “let’s get you to bed.”

            He runs a hot bath for Jared and sprinkles in a handful of lavender bath salts, because he’s read that lavender is supposed to help with sleep. Jared strips off his clothes almost mechanically, and sinks into the tub, folding up to rest his chin on his knees.

            “Are you okay?” Richard asks. Jared nods, detached and out of it.

            Richard kisses the top of Jared’s head – not something he gets to do often, given Jared’s height. “I’ll go get the bed ready, okay?”

            Jared nods again, reaching for the bottle of shampoo on the edge of the tub.

            When Jared gets out of the bath, he’s relaxed and sleepy and loose-limbed, and when he crawls under the covers Richard kisses him softly and gently, just as sleepy.

            Richard shuts off the bedside lamp, plunging the room into darkness. Jared reaches out and grabs Richard’s hand, interlacing their fingers in the dark. He drifts off to sleep like that, only to wake a few hours later, shaking and crying, with Richard wrapped around him, whispering “It’s okay. You’re okay. You’re safe. I’m here. I love you.”

            It only makes Jared cry harder.

\----

            When Jared screams himself awake again the following night, Richard brings him a mug of warm almond milk. He remembers his mom bringing him warm milk after nightmares, and since Jared can’t drink milk, almond milk is the next best thing.

            Jared drinks it slowly, savoring every sip while Richard rubs his back soothingly. Having emptied the mug, he places it on the nightstand and snuggles close to Richard. He sleeps peacefully through the rest of the night.

\----

            The essential oil diffuser arrives the next day and that night before bed Richard plugs it in and fills it with lavender oil.

            It works pretty well – Jared sleeps peacefully through the night for the first time in days – but the smell of lavender grates on Richard’s nasal passages and keeps him awake.

            But seeing Jared sleeping so peacefully encourages Richard to tough it out.

            The next morning over breakfast, Jared says “You know, a lavender oil roll-on should have the same effect and it wouldn’t bother you as much as the diffuser.”

            “It doesn’t bother me,” Richard lies.

            Jared raises an eyebrow. “You were tossing and turning all night.”

            Richard sighs. “Okay, if you want to.”

            That night, Jared gets into bed smelling like lavender and snuggles next to Richard, his head on Richard’s shoulder.

\----

            No matter what position they fall asleep in, Richard always wakes up to find Jared wrapped around him with his head on Richard’s chest. At some point, he brings it up, and Jared shrugs and says “Your heartbeat is soothing. It lets me know you’re there and safe and alive.” He looks down at his tea, avoiding eye contact. “I have nightmares about losing you,” he admits softly, almost embarrassed by how much he cares.

            Richard leans across the table to kiss him. “I’m not going anywhere, I promise. And if it makes you feel safer, why don’t you try falling asleep like that tonight instead of snuggling up to me after a nightmare?”

            Jared takes Richard’s hand, interlacing their fingers. “I think I will.”


End file.
